Mutton Dressed as Lamb and the Style Police
Isn't the phrase 'mutton dressed as lamb' one of the worst ever dreamed up to keep older women firmly in their place? Last week I wrote about being styled with clothes from a new clothing range, Hope Fashions aimed 'at the over 40's and this provoked some comments on Facebook along the lines of "I HATE being told that I must wear certain things 'at my age." Whilst I heartily endorse that sentiment, I would also argue that there are still plenty of taboos for older women in terms of what is deemed acceptable over a certain age. The style police are everywhere just waiting to tell us what we should and shouldn't be allowed to do.
Leather Trousers. A few months ago Angela Ripon (71) strode out wearing black leather trousers and some fancy knee high boots. She is still enviably tall and slim and I think she looked fantastic. But she got loads of negative comments like the following one posted in a thread on a social media site for older women:
"Have just watched Rip off Britain where Angela Rippon was wearing leather trousers. She is 70, is it just me who thinks that's a no,no ?"
"I agree leather trousers look fabulous on a nice tight, young bottom and hideous on an old saggy one"
Angela's riposte to them was perfect: "When I was buying my leather trousers I didn't notice a label in them saying "Only to be worn by twenty somethings.'...The problem is, when you get to my age, the style police say you shouldn't wear this or that. I say knickers to that!"
Colourful Whacky Clothes. I love it when I find examples of women or styles which are unusual and slightly whacky. I am not remotely like that myself and don't feel that I can pull off that ethnic/boho/hippy vibe at all but I really admire it when I see it done well. I recently came across someone called Saramai who epitomises what I am talking about. I've also posted some wonderful Ari Seth Cohen photos on Facebook showing this kind of style and been amazed by some of the comments from the style police, like this one on our FB post:
"These ladies think they look fabulous and I think they've come off the wrong end of an argument with a rainbow and need to get back to the asylum."
Long Grey Hair. This one really gets the style police foaming at the mouth! There is something about allowing your hair to grow really long when you are older that seems to offend lots of people. I have written blogposts on this subject in the past because I was genuinely astonished when I first experienced this phenomenon when we were doing the makeup for a photo shoot with White Hot Hair. The wonderful Nicola Griffin (56) was one of the models so I took a photo on my phone and posted it on Facebook and these were two of the comments I got:
"She needs to have her hair cut it would take years off her."
"I personally don't like long hair on our age group..A sharp bob would be very smart on such lovely thick hair and such a good looking women."
Red Lipstick. It seems that at a given age (not sure which) lips are no longer suitable for the kind of attention that red lipsticks draws to them. The reason is probably similar to the one for cutting hair shorter the older you get. Red lips and lustrous locks are associated with a certain kind of allure and attraction thought no longer to apply to older women. Again, negative comments about this from the style police amazed me when I first read them. I have always loved red lipstick and wear it now for special occasions for sure, but I also apply LFF vibrant Cherry Red Lip Colour whenever I am in the mood to do so. I see no reason for anyone to object to that, but object they do! When I posted this photo by Ari Seth Cohen on Facebook I got this comment:
"I think that red lipstick looks hard and ageing with those ridiculous glasses and all that widows black."
Does any of this matter? Not if you genuinely don't give a damn what other people think like the wonderful Iris Apfel who at 94 breaks all the rules. However most (including me) aren't that brave. Having just looked at all five of the photos on this page, I have realised that my mother would have disapproved of them all! She is my own internalised style policewoman who believed in 'standards' and was by nature deeply conservative. But the style police are everywhere leaving comments like the ones above designed to keep us all in line. Maybe we need to take a leaf out of Angela Rippon's book and say in unison: "knickers to you, I'll wear what I like!"
Have you ever experienced comments from the style police? Have you become braver as you have got older or are you afraid of being seen as 'mutton dressed as lamb?'
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What Do You Think?
Comments 104
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13 Nov 2017
I think older people should wear what they like. If you are comfortable in leather pants and you have the body or you want your hair long do it. Everyone of the ladies above are beautiful and I specially love Iris Apfel with her wonderful jewellery. I won't wear whacky but I love boho style. I love my hair long and its almost grown out completely, luckily its blonde enough so the grey look like highlights. If people don't like whatever you wear let it be their problem.
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31 Jul 2016
Many, many, yea, many years ago I stopped coloring my hair, it had become such a nuisance. It is a very nice silver and black, thick and shiny and easily styled, or not. Started to go grey at nineteen, by thirty had white roots, so no more L'Oreal! It is, with my eyes, my best asset If I were taller it would be longer, but at five feet, short works best. Always please yourself, it's you you have to live with.
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31 Jul 2016
I subscribed to your blog to keep me from sinking into the super-conservative, "keep the noise down, lady" kind of thinking. At 76 I have become leery of bright lipstick, bright colors, and anything that smacks of lamb:mutton. You will help to pull me out of the depths. Howsomever, I draw the line at fascinators; here in the colonies, they come across as disoriented birds.
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15 May 2016
It isn't pressure - it's fun!
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10 Apr 2016
I bought a copy of NEW YOU (The Voice of Health and Beauty) when I was staying with my daughter in Santa Monica last year and on the front cover, in all her glorious, style and beauty, was a Carmen Dell'Orefice, now in her 80's. Her hair is pure silver and she looks amazing! She doesn't deny having been 'tweaked' in the past and admits to suffering the 'creeks' that aging brings, but my goodness, she oozes style and confidence. And I think that is the answer as the years roll on, is to have the CONFIDENCE to be yourself and dress in the STYLE you feel comfortable with and as Angela R says - "knickers" to rest! PS - I would dearly love to see pictures of some of those 'style police' - go on ladies, show us how we should be looking now we're over 50/60/70/80 plus! I dare you! Carol 66 and counting!